Raw opened tonight with new GM Mike Adamle comparing himself to Ronald Regan in his opening promo. When he wasn’t looking at his cue cards, Adamle did his best not to stutter through the promo - and he did much better than he does when he’s behind the commentating mic. Soon JBL and Chris Jericho were out on stage both arguing about how awesome they are and how each would be better than the other as the World Title contender at Summerslam.

Ultimately Adamle made a handcapped match where JBL and Jericho would take on CM Punk tonight. If either of them manages to pin Punk - that one would get the title shot.
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SpikeTV has made its first jump into the sitcom game with a series called “The Factory”. I got a chance to watch this earlier in the week, and I have to say I was surprised by a few things.

One, it really looked like it was going to be more of a “The Office” in a Factory type of show, and it really seems to be more of an “Always Sunny in Philadelphia” in a Factory type show.

I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.

The series is produced on a really low budget, which is extremely obvious when the cast is outside and the sun is obviously beating the hell out of the camera. The entire show was either under lit or over-exposed, and it made the production feel more like something I would watch on YouTube than on a major cable network.

The actors are all likable, and there were some funny moments in the episode, but I think overall this was a forgettable pilot. I didn’t walk away from it interested in seeing another episode.

The Middleman is an interesting enough show. I’m amazed at what they’ve been able to do on a basic cable budget. The premise is easy enough. A guy called “The Middleman” works as a kind of freelance “Man in Black”. After meeting a girl named Wendy who’s working as a temp at a science lab, he decides to recruit her to be his assistant and eventual replacement.

The series stars Matt Keeslar as the Middleman and Natalie Morales as Wendy Watson. In the pilot episode the duo spend most of their time shooting through lightning fast dialogue that would make Amy Sherman-Paladino blush. The show tries very hard to emulate its comic book roots, and just a dash of Barry Sonnenfeld/Joss Whedon style…which is where I thinkt the show trips up a bit.

The creative team is trying very hard to prove its comic book fanboy cred (even going so far as to throw in a “Mouse Guard” reference and a Barry Allen/Wally West debate…that’s HARDCORE, man). The show is almost begging to be a cult favorite, and maybe it will be…but they don’t have to make it so obvious.

Overall I found the show entertaining, but in need of some polish. Wendy’s over-confidence and lack of surprise or caring about…well, pretty much anything…is a real turn off. The character is supposed to be self-confident, but it comes off beyond cocky and moves into the arrogant category…hopefully they’ll reign that in a bit.

The show’s look is very impressive, and - as I said before - I’m very impressed with what they’ve done with the budget they have. I look forward to seeing where they go from here and how the show evolves.

Season 4, Episode 13 - There’s No Place Like Home (Part 2)

Think about what you watched last night. Then imagine that taking place in half the time. Thank you, ABC, for granting Lost one more hour.

This season has been, far and away, my favorite season so far of Lost…eclipsing even the first season, I think. The WGA strike actually benefited the show, in that the fat had to be trimmed, and the show was cut down to its rawest form. And the finale was a worthy sendoff.

Let’s look at what was awesome. First, Keamy. I wasn’t crazy about him when he first came around a few weeks ago, but last night he became one of my favorites. To begin with, we had this meeting of the two most able fighters on the island, him and Sayid. Best fight scene I’ve seen on television in a while. And then I thought we were going to have another Mikhail on our hands again…remember how our favorite cycloptic Russian just wouldn’t die last season? The scene in the Orchid station was one of my favorite of the night, kind of playing like a horror movie.

Which brings us to Ben. His murder of Keamy was just another example of why I love Michael Emerson. Ben knew that Keamy’s death would result in the destruction of the freighter…was it genuinely a crime of passion, or was it a part of the plan that Ben always has (as they reminded us in the recap)? Also, the thing with the wheel was kind of strange, but how do you pull off moving an island without making it look funky?

The moment between Desmond and Penny was another of my favorites of the night. It’s amazing how this little story that is almost never touched on can bring a smile to my face. She’s his hero…it’s beautiful.

Oh, and Walt got freaking enormous. They had to get him off the island…there’s no way they could explain away a growth spurt that huge in 100 days.

So, questions. Things were pretty bad in the days leading up to the Oceanic 6 leaving the island…what could have happened after that that was bad enough to make Locke leave the island? And why did he take up an alias? That makes it seem like he was taking up permanent residence back in the real world. And why would none of the survivors call him by John Locke, only by Jeremy Bentham? Here’s what Wikipedia says about the real Bentham:

Jeremy Bentham was an English jurist, philosopher, and legal and social reformer. He was a political radical, and a leading theorist in Anglo-American philosophy of law. He is best known for his advocacy of utilitarianism, for the concept of animal rights, and his opposition to the idea of natural rights, with his oft-quoted statement that the idea of such rights is “nonsense upon stilts.” He also influenced the development of welfarism.

Bentham’s position included arguments in favour of individual and economic freedom, the separation of church and state, freedom of expression, equal rights for women, the end of slavery, the abolition of physical punishment (including that of children), the right to divorce, free trade, usury, and the decriminalization of homosexuality.

So what is next season going to look like? It’s tough to even get my head around it…I’m guessing it will be a mixture…what happens on the island after the Oceanic 6 are gone that spurs Locke to go bring the survivors back, and the story of Jack, Kate, Aaron, Sayid, Hurley and Sun inevitably heading back to the island.

Last season’s finale was nothing short of mindblowing, and had me frothing for what would happen next. While this finale wasn’t that huge, it was still a very worth sendoff to a tremendous season. I’m excited to see what happens next.

Episode grade: A
Season grade: A+

For those of you who will be at Comic Con in San Diego, taking place July 24-27, it appears that the next phase of the Lost Experience will be kicking off then. Check out the details at the Octagon Global Recruiting site, which was advertised during the finale.

Normally, I don’t review movies here on TV Jab, but I think its ok to take a look at Speed Racer for a couple reasons.

1) Speed Racer started out as a television show long before I was born.

2) The movie has bombed at the box office, and the only place most of you are going to see it is on your televisions in your living rooms at home.

So, with that out of the way, this weekend my family and I decided to check out Speed Racer. My 4 year old was particularly interested in what she’d seen on the Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon ads. I have to admit, the “grown-up” trailers left me uninterested in this movie, but the kid’s comedy aspect of the film is played up in those commercials on the kid’s networks, and I thought that the movie might be an enjoyable kid’s romp.

My wife was also interested in seeing the film, but more out of curiosity of just what it was than any real love for the Speed Racer character.

When we walked into the theater it was 7:40 pm. 5 minutes before the movie was supposed to start. They had to stop off at the restroom, so I decided to walk into the theater to make sure we could get the best of whatever seats were left. This is only the second week of the film’s release, so I expected their to be at least a small crowd. When I walked in, however, I was SHOCKED to see that the theater was completely empty. Not a soul.

The last time I watched a movie in a completely empty theater was when Godzilla 2000 was released theatrically. It’s been a while.

I couldn’t believe there wasn’t anyone there, and I began to get a sinking feeling that this movie was going to be as truly terrible as Rotten Tomatoes says it is.

Before seeing the movie, all three of us had watched the first episode of the original Speed Racer cartoon on Hulu. I think it helped prepare us for what we were going to see…and I have to tell you, what we saw was amazing.

This film is an unapologetic love letter to the insanity of classic anime series like the one its based on, and it lets you know right up front what you’re getting into. This, like other live action films based on cartoons like The Flintstones, tries to accurately recreate the animated world - but this is one of the first films to truly do it successfully. If you are willing to allow yourself to embrace the world presented, this film is a joy from beginning to end.

I’ve read in several places that the film has a convoluted plot, but I honestly just don’t see it. The only place my daughter had a problem following along was at the very beginning when it flash back and forth from young Speed to adult Speed. After she understood what was happening there, she had no problems understanding the rest of the film. Sure, I don’t think she gets all the talk about raising and lower the price of stocks, and corporate corruption, but she doesn’t have to get who the bad guy is, and what’s going on with the film.

Where I think a lot of people are getting confused or feel that the pacing is off are in the races, and I can understand that. The first race serves as an introduction to Speed, where he’s at, and what his life is like. The second race is Speed coming into his own - and is the best race of the film. This race brings in every element of the classic series, and is - by far - the best race in the film. It’s so good, and so long, it almost feels like the end of the film itself. This is the race where you’re truly routing for Speed. By the third race, the character arc is complete and the race itself is presented not as a traditional “end of the movie win” (where we don’t “know” if the hero is going to win or not) but more as a culmination of everything that Speed had learned in the previous hour and half.

It’s a very different pacing choice, that I can see might throw some people off, but I think the film successfully pulls it off.

This movie, successful at the box office or not, is going to sell many Blu-Ray players when it hits DVD/HD. It’s a visual masterpiece, and when it ended, all three of us left the empty theater ecstatic.

My 4 year old now wants a Mach 5 for her first car when she turns 16, and I’m pretty sure my wife would be fine with it if I showed up in one as the new family vehicle (as long as there was a back seat of some kind). We were all eaten up with this film, and really, truly, enjoyed it.

I hope you’ll give it a chance. Forget what you’ve read from everywhere (including here), and just go see the movie. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion influence your experience with this movie. Some of you will become life-long fans, others may not be impressed.

I am now, and forever, a Speed Racer fan because of this movie.

Season 4, Episode 12 – There’s No Place Like Home

I was reading an interview with Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse the other day, and they were talking about how they were sitting around editing the finale and wondering how they ever thought they were going to fit it into the time they had. Now I feel their pain. There was a TON of stuff going on…so much that it almost felt overloaded at times. Imagine having to shave a whole hour off of what we’ve got now.

So…where to start. We see the Oceanic 6 making their arrival at home, and we finally hear their story in full…they floated on life cushions for days until the eight survivors landed on an uninhabited island. That number fell to six before they were rescued. (Why? Why not just say that they were the only survivors? To add some credibility to the story…or is there more to it?)

Sayid was reunited with his long lost (and soon to be dead) Nadia in a very touching scene. Sun stepped up to her father and put him in his place, taking control of his company with the large settlement she received from the crash. Hurley returns home to his family, only to start to slip back into insane-Hurley-mode when he sees the dreaded numbers on the odometer of his birthday present.

In the best scene of the night, Jack finally has the funeral for his father. After the ceremony, Carole Littleton approaches Jack and tells him that Christian was Claire’s father (though she had no idea that Jack even knew who Claire was). I think that moment was the best acting that we’ve seen out of Matthew Fox yet…I loved how he had to contain his feelings about Claire, who he became close with on the island, but still emote surprise to Carole. Great stuff there.

Island stuff now…first off, let’s talk about the original search party from the freighter. I’m really liking Daniel, especially now that he’s making goo-goo eyes at Charlotte and acting all heroic, going back to the island that he is so obviously terrified of. My biggest complaint is about Miles, though. I loved his character and was really excited to see where he was going to go, but he’s basically faded into the background over the last several episodes. Bring back Miles!

As usual, Ben stole the show last night…especially considering how little he was actually in the episode. Between the 15 year old crackers and “How many times have I told you…I always have a plan” he can take simple, mundane lines and turn them into something wonderful.

I think I’ve got the moving the island thing figured out…as close to figured out as possible when it comes to Lost, that is. Back before the season even started, ABC released an Orchid Station Orientation video (check it out here), which has led many to speculate that this station has some form of time-bending properties…and with all of the time-jumping stuff that’s been going on this season, that theory has gained more and more credibility. I think we’ve been thinking “how do you physically move an island?” The question is not where they’re going to move the island to, but rather when they’re going to move the island to. I could go much deeper, but I’ll let your own imaginations do that for you.

Great setup for a finale! This episode reairs at 8/7c on May 29, followed by the two-hour finale.

Season 4, Episode 14 (Se04,Ep14)

What an emotional roller coaster THAT was.

If you’re a die-hard ‘Office’ fan, and you don’t know what happened yet - just stop right now. DO NOT READ THIS. Just watch it and enjoy it. Here’s the entire episode for you to watch with limited commercial interruption.

Why? Because I had an excruciatingly wonderful time watching this episode, and I want you to have that same experience.

Ok - Now that you’ve watched the episode, let’s dish.

There is so much that happens in this episode that I’m just going to hit the bullet points then address some of them.

- Toby is leaving and Michael is so happy he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He demands a huge party

- Angela refuses, and Phyllis takes the lead on the party planning, including hunting down an “anti-gravity” machine

- Pam gets into a summer program at the Art School in New York, and Jim is incredibly excited for her

- Michael meets Holly, the new HR woman, and after initially hating her because she’s HR, becomes immediately smitten with her right after she insults Toby.

- In an attempt to haze Holly, Dwight tells her that Kevin is mentally challenged - which his speech and general disposition completely re-enforces (best sub-plot of the night)

- Toby goes hunting for a camera to take a picture with Pam (and comes off a little more creepy than usual)

- Michael attempts to create a mix tape by telling Holly he loves her. Jim talks him down off the wall and recaps his entire relationship with Pam…then gets an idea.

- Jim goes to Phyllis and give her some cash for fireworks at the party tonight. Then confesses he’s going to propose tonight.

- Kevin decides he’s going to bang Holly after she helps him pick chips from the vending machine.

- Jim finally shows some back bone and leaves Ryan a message to let him know that he’s going to fight back, and not take any crap from the little guy

- Michael and Holly share a wonderful moment in the floor of her office while he helps her fix a broken chair.

- Phyllis and Angela go at it over the party. Angela shreds her list of vendors out of spite.

- Michael gets really excited about the exit interview, but tones down his hatred for Toby to not offend Holly…but threatens to kill Toby if he talks crap about him in front of her.

- Then we see that Ryan has been arrested via a YouTube video - because of misleading the Dunder-Mifflin shareholders. Oscar says the real crime “was the beard”. Ha!

- Jim leaves another voice mail sticking it to Ryan for his arrest.

- Michael goes in his office an cries over Ryan’s arrest. Holly is touched and tries to help. THEY ARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER!

- The parking lot looks fantastic - and Pam is pretty sure that Jim is going to propose tonight.

- Michael even resists a “That’s what she said” to impress Holly, and lays into Dwight when he puts a raccoon in her car. (I want them to get together almost as much as Pam and Jim)

- Holly is very impressed that Kevin can drive his own car when he leaves for a supply run for the party.

- Michael gets on stage to sing a parody song he wrote for Toby set to “Goodbye Stranger”

- Pam insert interview has her confess that she always thought he was “kind of cute” - poor Toby.

- Holly is impressed with Michael’s performance and tells him that she’d love to hear another one of his songs…then Michael gets a phone call from Kevin saying he has to come to the store.

- Michael gets there…and see’s Jan…who is pregnant.

- Michael is too excited for words. Then Jan tells him its not his. She went to a sperm bank.

- Then she invites him to her lamaze class…which he says he’ll think about.

- Back at the party the mood is perfect. Pam has her head on Jim’s shoulder…he reaches for the ring…and….

- Andy gets up to make an announcement.

- Since the mood is perfect, he has decided to propose to Angela, who responds with a less than enthusiastic “ok”. (Keep in mind they haven’t even kissed yet.)

- The moment is ruined and Jim puts the ring back in his pocket.

- Dwight gets very serious and sad, saying “Well, it’s my own fault.”

- Toby shows up again wanting a picture with Pam, which Meredith takes…many shot of. Pam is trying to not be sad…because she really thought Jim was going to propose.

- Holly is excited to see Michael when he returns. She tries to ask him out to get dessert, but Michael is distracted. Kevin agrees to go with her instead.

- Back in the office Michael has security escort Toby off the premises, then calls Jan and tells her that he’ll go to the lamaze class. He’s excited about being “kind of a daddy”.

- Finally, Phyllis comes in to the office with all the light off and catches Angela and Dwight doing it.

******

I just honestly don’t even know where to start. I loved this episode so much. It was a great rollercoaster (I know I’ve already used that term) ride of emotion from beginning to end. There is not other comedy on television that makes you feel for its characters the way The Office does, and this episode was a perfect way to express that.

I want Michael to realize the mess that Jan is and get together with Holly. They have seriously recreated the Pam/Jim relationship in one episode with Michael and Holly - and I’m totally ready for them to move in that direction next season while Pam and Jim move into a new stage of their relationship.

It’s possible that Andy could be moving to the spin off after he finds out what happened at the end of this episode, or they could go another way with it entirely…who knows.

That’s what I love about this - I have no idea where they are going with this story, but I genuinely enjoyed it and can’t wait for the ride to continue in September.

Season 4, Episode 11 - Cabin Fever

Destiny, John, is a fickle bitch.

Not a lot of answers in last night’s episode…just more questions.

Apparently the powers that be have been grooming John Locke since his very birth. (Interesting note: the song that Emily Locke was listening to at the beginning - Everyday by Buddy Holly. What happened to Buddy Holly? Died in a plane crash.) Richard Alpert made not one but two trips to visit John over the course of his early life (with all the time travel that we’ve been seeing this season and last, I’m guessing that he travelled back from some point in the future). It seems that the island has many people “in on it”, as it seems that John’s grandmother recognized Alpert, and John’s caregiver when he was young as well as his teacher in high school really seemed to push him in that direction. Then, years later in therapy, Matthew Abbadon shows up to plant the idea of a walkabout in Locke’s head.

On the freighter, we continue with some of the grittiest stuff in Lost’s history. Keamy is ready to kill Michael because of his betrayal, but Mike’s island immunity power kicks in and jacks up Keamy’s gun, so he must resort to a good old-fashioned beat down.

This led to one big question: the second protocol. Keamy and Captain Gault have dual control keys to access a vault that contains…something. In this particular case, it reveals Ben’s new location on the island. Could this be something that was written by someone in the future with some kind of ultimate knowledge of everything that came before? Or is it like the box that Ben has where anything you want will appear?

The death toll rose by two this week, as Captain Gault and the good doctor both fell by Colonel Kurtz’s Keamy’s hand. And, as I’m sure you’ll remember, the doctor’s body has already turned up on the island, so once again we’ve got a time-jumping mindscrew. And so now, the army of mercenaries is again headed to land to wipe out the inhabitants, though this time, our heroes have Sayid on the way to help them.

Meanwhile, in his trek through the jungle, Locke has a vision of Ben’s old buddy Horace Goodspeed building a house for him and his wife. Horace seems to be stuck in some kind of time loop of his own, as he repeats himself several times. He does manage to plant the idea with John to return to the communal pit where the bodies of the DHARMA Initiative are buried, where John finds a map disclosing the location of the cabin.

In the midst of this journey, we get to the crux of the episode. This installment was about being chosen, and all that it entails. John has wanted for all his life to be special, but seems to fall short every time. Ben, on the other hand, feels that he has been chosen, but is rethinking what that means.

Once there, John is the only one willing to enter the cabin. Lo and behold, Christian Shephard is there waiting. I don’t think anyone who follows the show closely would have been really surprised by this…but I was surprised to see Claire there (though I shouldn’t have been…the last time we saw her, she was with Christian. What was surprising, though, was her coolness about the whole thing. Her baby, the one thing that has driven her character since the beginning of the show, is miles away, she knows that there are mercenaries coming to annihilate everyone on the island, and she’s the calmest and most laid back that we’ve ever seen her. Did she get a glimpse of the future and see that all will turn out well? Or, as is being widely speculated, is she dead and Jacob has taken over her earthly coil?

John only has time for one question, and he chose “How can I save the island?” Christian seemed to approve of this question, and in the final moment, we got our answer…he has to move the island.

This brings up ALL KINDS of questions. First, why? My guess is that the island is in some kind of time bending bubble. The comic book shown to young John early in the episode pictured a bubbled island floating in clouds…and way back in the first season, the comic that Walt was reading depicted a similar thing. Second, how? Hook up some cables to the freighter and drag it? Doubtful. Maybe the island has some kind of propulsion system itself. Or maybe it’s something deeper that we just can’t grasp yet. I’ll go with that.

All in all…decent episode. Nothing spectacular, but no real filler. Just an on par Lost episode.

Season 3, Episode 21

100 Word Review: Earl continues to be a show filled with people and characters that I love - that, for some reason, I just don’t care about. In this episode Earl discovered that marriage, no matter how hot the chick, has problems when you don’t know the other person very well before getting hitched. He and the wife disagreed on who the list should be handled. She thought returning what she stole was enough. Earl didn’t. So earl helped the guest star John Hedder win a bagging competition while she finished up her entire list in a week or so. Season Finale’s next week.

Season 2, Episode 15 - Season Finale

100 Word Review: SO - that was the season finale, huh? That Writer’s Strike was a real pain, wasn’t it? I mean, for this to be season finale…huh. I just don’t know quite what to say. Liz has a pregnancy scare, Jack has trouble getting fired from the Bush Administration. Matthew Broderick guest stars. Tracey continues to try to make his porn video game, and Kennith feuds with a rival page for a spot paging the Olympics. It’s filled with a bunch of absurd stuff and everything goes back to the way it was before by the end of the episode. Big whoop.